Doing What I Can


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March may be a little late to be talking New Years’ Resolutions but that’s ok because I’m hoping this is as much of a lifestyle change as turning my life around to be healthy has been.

I’m not sure when it started, but I feel lately like I’ve been living most of my adult life in “when” and “if” land. I’m waiting for some magical day when everything is in place before I actually do anything. Kind of like I need to be successful first, work for it later. It’s a really toxic and illogical way to look at things.

There are a million and one quotes on the internet to describe it. “Time passes anyway”, “a year from now you will wish you started today”. No matter which one you choose, they all amount to the same thing: just freaking do something – even if you don’t make it, you’ll be closer than if you did nothing at all.

This is tragic to admit in a public forum but I really fail at being an adult. Fail at any kind of follow through really. I’m working on it though – setting myself small goals that really should be part of any grown up’s schedule. Making them realistic for me – working with my strengths, acknowledging my weaknesses and taking baby steps to work on them. Doing what I can, where I am, with what I have. One thing at a time.

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An Introduction

Confession: I have no idea where to start. I just know that this – blogging, carving out my own little space on this giant world wide web is something I want to do. I have no idea how far I’m going to take it, or where it’s going to take me.

I’m 32.

I’m part freelance writer & marketing consultant. Part lady of leisure.  Part success, part failure. Mostly a work in progress. Sometimes it feels like the “free”part is the only thing I get out of freelancing, other times it’s an awesome way to make a living.

I have three great loves – The Blondes (my partner of just over 5 years and our recently adopted elderly Labrador named Chance) and Jasper, my first love and big black Labrador who lives with my Mum. I like dogs more than I like people.

I recently moved to the country and while I initially dreamed of growing veggies, hand raising baby cows and living off the land it has been a struggle. It can be isolating at the best of times, and a nightmare if you’re as opposed to change as I am.

Part of me wants to homestead, part of me wants to pack a bag and just be a nomad, travelling and adventuring all over the world. Mostly I just want to win lotto so I have enough money to do both.

Screenshot 2014-02-12 00.05.05I used to weigh 146kg. I now weigh 98kg. I still claim a 50kg loss as I did get down to 94kg at one stage but have been gaining and losing the same 4kg for the last year or so but still managed to complete the Tough Mudder obstacle course in August last year.

I thought I’d have my shit together by the time I was 25. I moved the goal post to 30 but now even 35 is seeming like a pipe dream. 148 Percent stands for the amount of weight I would have lost by the time I reach my goal weight, and also for the amount of effort I want to put into living each day to the full from here on in.